In The Fast Lane It Seems

It’s been awhile since I last posted, but as the title says I or I should say we have been in the fast lane so it seems. Things seem to be changing everyday. I sometimes don’t know which way I should go and or what I should do next. It seems so uncertain from day to day. Working on our list of things to take care of to help keep mom comfortable and at her home she loves even tho at times she doesn’t realize it’s her home. Things are just moving to fast so it seems.

I know Mother’s Day is right around the corner and I am thinking in the back of my mind will this be the last one that my mom will remember me or even be here. This goes along with my last post of not thinking to far into the future. I just try to think about each day as it comes, but tonight as I type this I am thinking about my mom’s doctors appointment tomorrow what will come from this appointment, what is going to change for her, how am I going to be able to help her and all that jazz. These are things that are on my mind.

Some good things have been happening too. Over the past month I have been able to have some lunches with my mom and family. We got to spend Easter together too. With this extra time I got to spend with her I got to hear a few things from her past which seems at times is where she seems to be and for now she knows me and her grandkids too. She loves her family. She told me that she loved me the other day and was very proud of me and I truly saw it in her eyes. I can’t explain that feeling that I saw it was like looking into someone’s soul and truly seeing them at their most vulnerable moment.

So tomorrow like I said is her next appointment with the Neurologist and I am not sure what is going to happen. I know I have to plan several hours in advance to make sure I can get mom there on time with all that goes into making sure she is ready on time. These are just things you have to do so that the day goes a smoothly has it can go. So you hope. Please don’t think I am complaining, I am not I, am just learning how to navigate thru what I am seeing thru the lens of Dementia.

Fast Track into a fog…not knowing what is on the other side.

I thank you for taking the time to read my posts. I hope it helps you in some way or another. This has helped me with getting my feelings out and almost like therapy for me. I would love to hear from you too. Anyone else going through similar things or have anything they would love to share no judgment here just support and to know you are not alone. Blessings to you all and have a Blessed night.

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